S5 – The S5 reviews itself and owner (World’s first)
Just a bit of fun – what if a S5 is “intelligent” and aware enough to do a review of itself and its owner??
Here’s my humourous attempt at just that..:)
NOTE: I’ll be doing a proper S5 review shortly and giving my thoughts on the S5.
Hello World or as my dad would say, “G’day from Down Under!”
My name is Viliv but good friends tend to call me S5.
I was born in a hospital called Yukyung in Korea 4 months ago and weighed a mere 422grams when the doctor in the white coat pulled me off the assembly line! I’m quite petite in statue, measuring only 3.3 inches tall, 6.1 inches wide and 0.9 inches thick. Alas, I have been told I won’t grow any taller and heavier..such is life!
Apparently, I had hundreds of twin brothers and sisters who came into the world around the same time as I did. I was told by the caring folks at the Yukyung hospital that we were very special Viliv children (devices). There were many prospective parents (owners like us!) looking to adopt us and apparently there was a long waiting adoption line (pre-order) all over the world! How exciting!
All of us S5s were very well looked after our birth. Each of us were assigned a beautiful Nanny (aka the Viliv campaign girls) who looked after us. My Nanny’s the one on the far right. Isn’t she gorgeous?
Although I’m only a toddler, I am already a seasoned traveller! At age 1 month, I was put on a priority plane from Korea to a country called the United States, where some nice folks at a Adoption centre called http://www.dynamism.com were handling my adoption papers. Apparently, I was destined to be adopted by a very nice Australian man called jamesfongster.
Within a few days, I was then on a plane from the US and arrived in Melbourne, Australia to the open hands of my new parent!
I remember when jamesfongster a.k.a dad first held me in his hands and woke me up (first boot) for the first time and I looked at his big, grinning face. I gave him a wide grin (wide screen WSVGA, 1024×600 res) back! Mum’s (J’s wife) first reaction was quite scary – she frowned at me, then frowned at dad. But when dad whispered some comforting words to mum, she’s gave me a beaming smile as well! I think I overheard dad saying to mum “this one’s a stayer..no more gadgets this year..promise”…I wonder what he meant by that?
I’m a light sleeper and it doesn’t take me long to wake up, usually 3 to 4 seconds (from standby) is all I need to wake up from my slumble (standby mode).
I have a big heart (processor, Atom Z520 / 1.33 GHz) and a pretty good memory for things (DDR2 SDRAM 1G) and I’m working on my memory retention which I’m sure I can improve on someday. (60G HDD, wish I had a SSD!).
I can quite easily handle multiple tasks at the same time (usually multiple sessions of firefox with numerous extensions, Microsoft Outlook, iTunes, Zero Keyboard) but then I have a limit..after all, I’m only “human” right?
Dad likes to poke my face a lot (4.8″ touchscreen) and I tend to giggle (haptic feedback) everytime he does that.
The Yukyung folks taught me to speak English Windows XP Home Edition – but daddy says self improvement from an early age is very important and he’ll teach me other languages some day (Windows Vista, 7, Linux maybe??)
I’m quite energetic and able to keep awake for 6 hours (battery life), watching movies, talking (Skype via BT headset) and surfing around the internet with dad. Dad tends to do a lot of cloud computing (keeping his head above the clouds he calls it) so not a lot of software has been given to me to play with.
I interact very well with others (on screen keyboard with haptic feedback, WLAN 802.11b/g ) and very sociable with other devices my age (1x USB2.0, 1x mini USB Host connector, I/O port for video/audio interfacing and bluetooth).
Oh, I’m also very good with directions, unlike dad who gets lost around every corner. Sad to say, he’s quite hopeless with directions.
I have an in built GPS (Sirf Star3) and dad bought me a Copilot software to help me guide him whenever he’s lost. Tell you what, I’m proud that I have successfully guided him back home on at least 5 occasions during the last 2 months! 🙂
My dad bought me a leather suit to keep me warm..it’s even got my name “Viliv” on it..how cool!
Dad’s bought me lots of toys to play with..so I’m very seldom bored! He tends to take me on the road with him everyday. Unfortunately, he can’t play with me at work because in his place of work, the wireless environment is very secured and they don’t allow devices like me to join their private network. Dad has to rely on his work device (Dell D430) but I still have lunch with him on most days (Mac WiFi, reading rssfeeds, answering emails, blogging!) and we sometimes read a book together (eBook, Stanza) on the train back home.
Oh, did I mention I have an older brother? His name is iPhone (3G). He’s been with dad for over 12 months and he’s very smart for his age! He’s now a lot smarter (upgraded to iPhone 3.0) and there are things that I wish I could do (ie, S5 lacks phone and HSDPA functionalities) that brother iPhone can. Dad relies on big brother to run the family business (ie, my daily workhorse) but I am still very special as dad still needs me for special chores (full blown MS Office functionalites) that brother iPhone can’t provide for. Needless to say, my brother and I have become somewhat inseparable!
Talking about family, I’ll soon have a Viliv cousin. Uncle D’s waiting eagerly at the Dynamism adoption centre. He’ll be called vilivx70. Can’t wait to meet him!
Yawn, I’ve been awake for more than 5 plus hours and I think I’m finally getting tired. I need to take some baby food(recharge) and will get some shuteye (standby mode) now.
Bye for now!